It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
