dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
my penis made a compromise with my morals
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize