I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
