im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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