hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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