I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize