Nicole vs. Life
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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