grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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