i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
