I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
