Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
