dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
