is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
How does it feel to date your dad?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
