that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
