Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Randomize
