naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I have already put on my inside pants.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
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