she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
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