it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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