I accidentally had phone sex last night
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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