Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Randomize
