just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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