Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Randomize
