hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.�
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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