yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
