New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
