just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
The power of my boobs compel you
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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