I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize