Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
