I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
How naked do you want me to be?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
