You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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