I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
