oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
