She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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