Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
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