Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
