It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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