also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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