Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
