She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of j�ger and an empty bed here Friday.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
My dick has a subreddit
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
