i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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