I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
