Say something about gay babies.
he puts the penis in happiness.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Randomize
