she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
