So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize
