yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
just found out that she named her cat after me.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
