I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Is it because I queefed?
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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