On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
