The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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