I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
