ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
